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SGA The Shrine thoughts
Aug. 23rd, 2008 01:37 amWell, not so much about the show as to what it meant to me. Watching this episode was probably hard for a lot of you. The news about the cancellation made this bittersweet. It was much harder for me. I can say that this episode was probably one of the best SGA episodes to date. Now some of you may have issues, but you have to agree that the performances were excellent. I'm not going into detail or doing an episode review because I don't want place this under a cut. That's not what this post is about. This post is about how something so silly as my scifi show can make me cry. Not because of the words that were written or the camera shots or the music, but because of how it made me feel and the memories it triggered.
I hope I'm not spoiling anything by stating that the episode is about memory loss. Again, avoiding detail, it's about how memory loss affects not just the person that it happens to, but to the people around them.
My father was the funniest, kindest, most loving person I've ever met. I hope that I'm like him. My mother certainly thinks so. I was always daddy's girl. Being an only child we were the three musketeers. My father was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's when I was in college. It started when he got fired from his job. He couldn't seem to get a new one. His former co-workers, who adored him, were concerned. They convinced my mom to take him to the doctor. It took the better part of a year to get the diagnosis, frontal lobe dementia. Mostly because my father was not yet 54, far to early to be developing any kind of age induced dementia. The year I graduated from college, my mother asked me to come home and take care of my dad. At first it was fun. I was simply making sure that he didn't leave the stove on and the like. We had a blast hanging out. The doctor had given dad an estimate of three years. I took care of him for four. By the end of that time frame, the vivacious comedian I knew was gone. I was feeding, bathing, and changing adult diapers. His medical needs became so much that we were forced to place him in a nursing home for almost two years. Towards the end he had lost his motor functions and spent his life in a special chair because he could no longer walk. He got very ill suddenly and we had to move him to a hospital. Quite out of the blue it was discovered that he had advanced bladder cancer. Due to his condition, it's impossible to know if he was hurting before the signs became obvious to my mother and his caretakers. He simply had no way of telling us, and may not have even really understood what was happening to him.
He died less than a week after we had discovered the cancer. I miss my dad very much. Mostly when I need someone to cheer me up, when times are hard. They've been hard lately, and I just know he'd give me the kick in the pants that I'd need and make me laugh while doing it if he was here.
I've not thought about all of this in a while. I didn't expect my little fannish show to touch me in the way that it has tonight. They say science fiction is a mirror not of who we are, but who we want to be. But sometimes it is who we are, and of that we can be thankful. I am going to miss Stargate: Atlantis when it is gone. I'm going to miss the characters and all the people that bring them to life. I have to say though, in all honesty, it's been wonderful. I'm not sure when I'll be able to watch this episode again, but I hope some of you do. There's a message there amongst the snarky remarks and subtext we all thrive on.
Cherish what you have, because you may not always have it. Keep memories alive not just for yourself, but for others. And NEVER give up hope.
Alzheimer's Association
I hope I'm not spoiling anything by stating that the episode is about memory loss. Again, avoiding detail, it's about how memory loss affects not just the person that it happens to, but to the people around them.
My father was the funniest, kindest, most loving person I've ever met. I hope that I'm like him. My mother certainly thinks so. I was always daddy's girl. Being an only child we were the three musketeers. My father was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's when I was in college. It started when he got fired from his job. He couldn't seem to get a new one. His former co-workers, who adored him, were concerned. They convinced my mom to take him to the doctor. It took the better part of a year to get the diagnosis, frontal lobe dementia. Mostly because my father was not yet 54, far to early to be developing any kind of age induced dementia. The year I graduated from college, my mother asked me to come home and take care of my dad. At first it was fun. I was simply making sure that he didn't leave the stove on and the like. We had a blast hanging out. The doctor had given dad an estimate of three years. I took care of him for four. By the end of that time frame, the vivacious comedian I knew was gone. I was feeding, bathing, and changing adult diapers. His medical needs became so much that we were forced to place him in a nursing home for almost two years. Towards the end he had lost his motor functions and spent his life in a special chair because he could no longer walk. He got very ill suddenly and we had to move him to a hospital. Quite out of the blue it was discovered that he had advanced bladder cancer. Due to his condition, it's impossible to know if he was hurting before the signs became obvious to my mother and his caretakers. He simply had no way of telling us, and may not have even really understood what was happening to him.
He died less than a week after we had discovered the cancer. I miss my dad very much. Mostly when I need someone to cheer me up, when times are hard. They've been hard lately, and I just know he'd give me the kick in the pants that I'd need and make me laugh while doing it if he was here.
I've not thought about all of this in a while. I didn't expect my little fannish show to touch me in the way that it has tonight. They say science fiction is a mirror not of who we are, but who we want to be. But sometimes it is who we are, and of that we can be thankful. I am going to miss Stargate: Atlantis when it is gone. I'm going to miss the characters and all the people that bring them to life. I have to say though, in all honesty, it's been wonderful. I'm not sure when I'll be able to watch this episode again, but I hope some of you do. There's a message there amongst the snarky remarks and subtext we all thrive on.
Cherish what you have, because you may not always have it. Keep memories alive not just for yourself, but for others. And NEVER give up hope.
Alzheimer's Association
